A new goal....

So we finally got the May issue of the Ensign, which is always my favorite because it contains all the talks from April conference. We are so lucky to have them in the written form, because lets be honest we don't listen to every talk given so intently we never forget it. So, my new goal is to read and sincerly study out every talk in this May ensign. I started yesterday, with a talk given my Julie B. Beck the Relif Society General President, entitled And Upon the Handmaids in Those Days Will I Pour Out My Spirit. It talked alot about how we as women in the church need to learn to define our success in life. Do we define it by the worlds standards, how powerful are we, or do we define it by how close our relationship with God is? I know lately I have done the first of the two. Eduation and success have always been of upmost importants to me. I believe my Heavenly Father gave me that attribute for a specific reason, but am I using it in the way he wanted me to? Since little Porter has come into my life, it seems like I am in a content internal battle with myself. I love being Porters mom, he feels me with happiness, but on the other hand I love teaching and in my head people view me as more successful in life through that. I know its a skewed way of thinking, that's way I am searching for a stronger testimony and a better understand of my Father's plan for me. There was one part in the talk that really stood out to me it read, " We know that we are successful if we liveso that we qualify for, receive, and know how to follow the Spirit. when we have done our very best, we may still experience diappointments, but we will not be disappointed in ourselves. We can feel certain that the Lord is pleased when we feel the Spirit working through us. Peace, Joy, and Hope are available to those who measure success properly." I guess that last part is what really struck a cord with me. Peace, Joy, and Happiness come to those who measure success properly, that is what I need to learn, with my Heavenly Father's guidance. Also I wanted to share a scripture that goes along with this talk. It is found in D&C 11: 11-13: ...Verily, Verily I say unto thee, put your trust in that Spirit which leadth to do good yea, to do justly, to walk humbly, to judge righteously;and this is my Spirit.